A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
180806 陈心蕊 Xinlei Xhen
After watching And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles, some questions resounds around me. What is art? What makes it good or bad? And who decide? What are the standards? What a woman is going to be?
What is art? Looked up in the dictionary, “art” is the making of objects, images, music, etc. that are beautiful or that express feelings. In both movies, we see different people have different understandings of art and take different actions to pursuit the art in their mind. And the Spring Comes, which is directed by Gu Changwei and shown in 2007, shows us a story between three people who are seeking for arts and all fighting for their ambitions for arts, including painting, singing and ballet dancing. In my opinion, the arts in their times are cast into the shade because it is impossible for common people in their district to appreciate them. However, on the other hand, those characters are so confident of their talent and attach too high expectation to it. For example, watching the woman in the office says “Enough, I have known your level about singing the opera.” to Wang Cailing, it is obvious that besides the poor appearance, her ability also gets in the way for her to achieve her dream performing in the stage. From my perspective, Mr. Hu is one of those that are real artists. Ballet dancer Mr. Hu devotes himself to Ballet and teach women to dance. From points of those people in that society, Mr. Hu is womanish and what he is doing is untraditional and abnormal. However, the shoes in prison help him rotate successfully and he still enjoy his dance. May this is art as told.
Another film Mona Lisa Smiles also begins with arts, but I want to concentrate more on the fight to the traditional standards and those girls’ courage. The girls in this university are so educated that they have read the book ahead and remembered everything in the book. It seems nothing to teach them. However, as a matter of fact, something new and important for woman is going to be passed to those hard and good girls. That’s because they are not really work for themselves but for their future family. Maybe you will say there is nothing wrong. Nevertheless, marriage is on the way as soon as they graduate, which means there is no time for them to aspire after engaging in advance studies, like one of the girls in the film nearly gives up her application for faculty of law in order to build a good family in most people’s mind. Fortunately, Miss. Katherine pulls them out of the “right” ingrained concept. Special and untraditional ways adopted and new idea spread by Katherine open a new world for girls who have been told to be the role they are born to fill, and all things a girl has learned are prepared for husband, her children and her family but not really for herself. At the end of the story, the girls harvest memorable memory with Katherine and all of them find the road they should go. From the film, I learn that we girls are supposed to live for ourselves as well as making effort to realize our value.
The two films both describe roles and the society behind them for us vividly. Although two stories happen in different times in diffident countries, they both succeed in touching audiences’ hearts and striking a chord. We are impressed mostly by the great woman Katherine for her attempt to change the girls and teach them to live as a dependent and ideologically independent person. It’s of great pleasure to witness that girls find their way for their futures and begin to make great efforts for themselves. The atmosphere of the society also has a well change in freedom of women. Plots developing along the time show us those characteristic characters that are representatives of people in their times even in modern days, not only Wang Cailing and Mr. Hu, but also Katherine and those girls. Behind the films, it reveals that how they are changed by the society and by some people arise in their life. Either the sorrowful ending or the happy ending presses me to consider more about the ways we treat our future and the attitudes we face ourselves.
As far as I am concerned, traditional opinions and common senses of worth as well as regulations and so-called experiences are restraining our new ideas and protecting us from accepting something better in our life. Art is the thing that is depending on one's point of view, which is also no standard. Let’s try to open our mind to new ideas and to be someone that seeks for truth beyond traditions, beyond definitions and beyond images. There is no standard for how to live but live in your way.
A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
-
Lauren S.
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Tue Apr 09, 2019 12:41 am
- Location: University Park, PA
- University: Penn State University
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Hi Xinlei Xhen,
I have made some comments on the attached document. Great points in your essay!
Thanks, Lauren Sonsteby
I have made some comments on the attached document. Great points in your essay!
Thanks, Lauren Sonsteby
- Attachments
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- Xinlei C Comments.docx
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Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Hey Xinlei,
First Paragraph:
After watching And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles, some questions resounds (resound) around me. What is art? What makes it good or bad? And who decide? What are the standards? What a woman is going to be? (Revise this sentence to make more sense to the reader. Not sure what you mean here. Also not sure how you are tying art and women together. It is an abrupt switch. Flesh out this section and add supporting detail leading to a thesis.)
Second Paragraph:
What is art? (Great flow here introducing your first idea.) Looked up in the (avoid verbiage writing and keep more concise. Ex: “In the dictionary,”) dictionary, “art” (I do not believe the quotes are needed here) is the making of objects, images, music, etc (do not use etc. unless absolutely necessary. Instead just describe the whole idea as best you can) that are beautiful or that express feelings. (GOOD INTRO AND FLOW INTO PG) In both movies, we see different people have different understandings of art and take different actions to pursuit the art in their mind (consider revising) And the Spring Comes, which is directed by Gu Changwei and shown in 2007, shows (instead of repetition, choose different word. Ex: “tells a story”) us a story between three people who are seeking for arts and all fighting for their ambitions for arts (be explicit here. What art are they seeking? What constitutes their ambition?), including painting, singing and ballet dancing. In my opinion, the arts in their times are cast into the shade (avoid these types of verbal phrases and be more specific about what you mean. You are focusing a lot of this paragraph on art and not so much about how you are trying to relate it to the movie) because it is impossible for common people in their district to appreciate them. However, on the other hand, those characters are so confident of their talent and attach too high expectation to it. For example, watching the woman in the office says “Enough, I have known your level about singing the opera.” to Wang Cailing, it is obvious that besides the poor appearance, her ability also gets in the way for her to achieve her dream performing in the stage. From my perspective, Mr. Hu is one of those that are real artists. Ballet dancer Mr. Hu devotes himself to Ballet and teach women to dance. From points of those people in that society, Mr. Hu is womanish and what he is doing is untraditional and abnormal. However, the shoes in prison help him rotate successfully and he still enjoy his dance. May this is art as told (consider revising).
***This paragraph could use a lot more detail an analysis between what is art and how that relates to the movies. The detail you give about Mr. Hu concludes that he is a real artist. Aren’t they all really artist? How does Mr. Hu being an artist relate to what art is?***
Third Paragraph:
Another film Mona Lisa Smiles also begins with arts, but I want to concentrate more on the fight to the traditional standards and those girls’ courage. The girls in this university are so educated that they have read the book ahead and remembered everything in the book. It seems nothing to teach them. However, as a matter of fact, something new and important for woman is going to be passed to those hard and good girls. That’s because they are not really work for themselves but for their future family. Maybe you will say there is nothing wrong. Nevertheless, marriage is on the way as soon as they graduate, which means there is no time for them to aspire after engaging in advance studies, (start new sentence) like one of the girls in the film nearly gives up her application for faculty of law in order to build a good family in most people’s mind. Fortunately, Miss. Katherine pulls them out of the “right” ingrained concept (describe this concept to the reader). Special and untraditional ways adopted and new idea spread by Katherine open a new world for girls who have been told to be the role they are born to fill, and all things a girl has learned are prepared for husband, her children and her family but not really for herself. At the end of the story, the girls harvest memorable memory with Katherine and all of them find the road they should go. From the film, I learn that we girls are supposed to live for ourselves as well as making effort to realize our value.
***This paragraph have very good details from the movie, but steers away from you focus and message about art. At this point into your paper, I would have tried to incorporate Mona Lisa Smiles into your second paragraph and then focus on what makes art good or bad in both movies for the third paragraph. I am still not sure how you are intending to tie in your questions about art with the women and their stories, especially because you are mentioning a man in the second paragraph right after and introduction geared towards women.***
Fourth Paragraph:
The two films both describe roles and the society behind them for us vividly. Although two stories happen in different times in diffident countries, they both succeed in touching audiences’ hearts and striking a chord. We are impressed mostly by the great woman Katherine for her attempt to change the girls and teach them to live as a dependent and ideologically independent person. It’s of great pleasure to witness that girls find their way for their futures and begin to make great efforts for themselves. The atmosphere of the society also has a well change in freedom of women. Plots developing along the time show us those characteristic characters (consider revising for clarity. Ex: “Developing plots show us character experiences and conflicts..”) that are representatives of people in their times even in modern days, not only Wang Cailing and Mr. Hu, but also Katherine and those girls. Behind the films, it reveals that how they are changed by the society and by some people arise in their life. Either the sorrowful ending or the happy ending presses me to consider more about the ways we treat our future and the attitudes we face ourselves.
***At this point in your paper you are going very far away from the initial ideas introduced in your opening paragraph. I feel like your essay gets deeper into detail an analysis as your essay progresses and you are discussing what is really intriguing to your in the movies. Stick with these ideas that you are passionate about and writing about well. Work backwards and change your thesis, pulling together your analyses in the body of the essay to draw a conclusion.***
Fifth Paragraph:
As far as I am concerned, traditional opinions and common senses of worth as well as regulations and so-called experiences are restraining our new ideas and protecting us from accepting something better in our life. Art is the thing that is depending on one's point of view, which is also no standard. Let’s try to open our mind to new ideas and to be someone that seeks for truth beyond traditions, beyond definitions and beyond images. There is no standard for how to live but live in your way.
***If this is the conclusion your are drawing I would suggest either using different supporting detail to analyze, or changing the focus of your paper.***
More Notes:
1. Watch for simple singular/plural grammar agreements of words in your sentences.
2. Be more concise and explicit in what you are trying to say. The writing becomes very vague and general in some areas.
3. Consider formulating a title for your essay that specifically describes your main message.
Thank you for the opportunity to work with you. Best of luck on your final essay!
First Paragraph:
After watching And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles, some questions resounds (resound) around me. What is art? What makes it good or bad? And who decide? What are the standards? What a woman is going to be? (Revise this sentence to make more sense to the reader. Not sure what you mean here. Also not sure how you are tying art and women together. It is an abrupt switch. Flesh out this section and add supporting detail leading to a thesis.)
Second Paragraph:
What is art? (Great flow here introducing your first idea.) Looked up in the (avoid verbiage writing and keep more concise. Ex: “In the dictionary,”) dictionary, “art” (I do not believe the quotes are needed here) is the making of objects, images, music, etc (do not use etc. unless absolutely necessary. Instead just describe the whole idea as best you can) that are beautiful or that express feelings. (GOOD INTRO AND FLOW INTO PG) In both movies, we see different people have different understandings of art and take different actions to pursuit the art in their mind (consider revising) And the Spring Comes, which is directed by Gu Changwei and shown in 2007, shows (instead of repetition, choose different word. Ex: “tells a story”) us a story between three people who are seeking for arts and all fighting for their ambitions for arts (be explicit here. What art are they seeking? What constitutes their ambition?), including painting, singing and ballet dancing. In my opinion, the arts in their times are cast into the shade (avoid these types of verbal phrases and be more specific about what you mean. You are focusing a lot of this paragraph on art and not so much about how you are trying to relate it to the movie) because it is impossible for common people in their district to appreciate them. However, on the other hand, those characters are so confident of their talent and attach too high expectation to it. For example, watching the woman in the office says “Enough, I have known your level about singing the opera.” to Wang Cailing, it is obvious that besides the poor appearance, her ability also gets in the way for her to achieve her dream performing in the stage. From my perspective, Mr. Hu is one of those that are real artists. Ballet dancer Mr. Hu devotes himself to Ballet and teach women to dance. From points of those people in that society, Mr. Hu is womanish and what he is doing is untraditional and abnormal. However, the shoes in prison help him rotate successfully and he still enjoy his dance. May this is art as told (consider revising).
***This paragraph could use a lot more detail an analysis between what is art and how that relates to the movies. The detail you give about Mr. Hu concludes that he is a real artist. Aren’t they all really artist? How does Mr. Hu being an artist relate to what art is?***
Third Paragraph:
Another film Mona Lisa Smiles also begins with arts, but I want to concentrate more on the fight to the traditional standards and those girls’ courage. The girls in this university are so educated that they have read the book ahead and remembered everything in the book. It seems nothing to teach them. However, as a matter of fact, something new and important for woman is going to be passed to those hard and good girls. That’s because they are not really work for themselves but for their future family. Maybe you will say there is nothing wrong. Nevertheless, marriage is on the way as soon as they graduate, which means there is no time for them to aspire after engaging in advance studies, (start new sentence) like one of the girls in the film nearly gives up her application for faculty of law in order to build a good family in most people’s mind. Fortunately, Miss. Katherine pulls them out of the “right” ingrained concept (describe this concept to the reader). Special and untraditional ways adopted and new idea spread by Katherine open a new world for girls who have been told to be the role they are born to fill, and all things a girl has learned are prepared for husband, her children and her family but not really for herself. At the end of the story, the girls harvest memorable memory with Katherine and all of them find the road they should go. From the film, I learn that we girls are supposed to live for ourselves as well as making effort to realize our value.
***This paragraph have very good details from the movie, but steers away from you focus and message about art. At this point into your paper, I would have tried to incorporate Mona Lisa Smiles into your second paragraph and then focus on what makes art good or bad in both movies for the third paragraph. I am still not sure how you are intending to tie in your questions about art with the women and their stories, especially because you are mentioning a man in the second paragraph right after and introduction geared towards women.***
Fourth Paragraph:
The two films both describe roles and the society behind them for us vividly. Although two stories happen in different times in diffident countries, they both succeed in touching audiences’ hearts and striking a chord. We are impressed mostly by the great woman Katherine for her attempt to change the girls and teach them to live as a dependent and ideologically independent person. It’s of great pleasure to witness that girls find their way for their futures and begin to make great efforts for themselves. The atmosphere of the society also has a well change in freedom of women. Plots developing along the time show us those characteristic characters (consider revising for clarity. Ex: “Developing plots show us character experiences and conflicts..”) that are representatives of people in their times even in modern days, not only Wang Cailing and Mr. Hu, but also Katherine and those girls. Behind the films, it reveals that how they are changed by the society and by some people arise in their life. Either the sorrowful ending or the happy ending presses me to consider more about the ways we treat our future and the attitudes we face ourselves.
***At this point in your paper you are going very far away from the initial ideas introduced in your opening paragraph. I feel like your essay gets deeper into detail an analysis as your essay progresses and you are discussing what is really intriguing to your in the movies. Stick with these ideas that you are passionate about and writing about well. Work backwards and change your thesis, pulling together your analyses in the body of the essay to draw a conclusion.***
Fifth Paragraph:
As far as I am concerned, traditional opinions and common senses of worth as well as regulations and so-called experiences are restraining our new ideas and protecting us from accepting something better in our life. Art is the thing that is depending on one's point of view, which is also no standard. Let’s try to open our mind to new ideas and to be someone that seeks for truth beyond traditions, beyond definitions and beyond images. There is no standard for how to live but live in your way.
***If this is the conclusion your are drawing I would suggest either using different supporting detail to analyze, or changing the focus of your paper.***
More Notes:
1. Watch for simple singular/plural grammar agreements of words in your sentences.
2. Be more concise and explicit in what you are trying to say. The writing becomes very vague and general in some areas.
3. Consider formulating a title for your essay that specifically describes your main message.
Thank you for the opportunity to work with you. Best of luck on your final essay!
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Dear Tierra and Lauren,
From both of your replies, I find some shortcomings in my essay:
1. Some grammar mistakes and poor in usage of words and sentences.
2. I cannot go to deep into the films and catch some exact details to make my opinions concise and explicit, which makes me just express myself all the time but fail to prove them well.
3. From Tierra’ reply, I know that my essay structure are lack of the connection of the two films and the main body is part from the initial part.
In my next essay, I changed something wrong mentioned in your review, but I am so sorry to say that although I have tried to add some details to explain my ideas, it still not enough.
I still have a big question——how should I use correct punctuation when using a quote. I will be very appreciated it if you provide me with some examples.
Thanks a lot for those advice and exchange these days.
From both of your replies, I find some shortcomings in my essay:
1. Some grammar mistakes and poor in usage of words and sentences.
2. I cannot go to deep into the films and catch some exact details to make my opinions concise and explicit, which makes me just express myself all the time but fail to prove them well.
3. From Tierra’ reply, I know that my essay structure are lack of the connection of the two films and the main body is part from the initial part.
In my next essay, I changed something wrong mentioned in your review, but I am so sorry to say that although I have tried to add some details to explain my ideas, it still not enough.
I still have a big question——how should I use correct punctuation when using a quote. I will be very appreciated it if you provide me with some examples.
Thanks a lot for those advice and exchange these days.
- Attachments
-
- After Exchange Xinlei. C A film review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa SmilesStandard？.docx
- (19.25 KiB) Downloaded 393 times
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Lauren S.
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Tue Apr 09, 2019 12:41 am
- Location: University Park, PA
- University: Penn State University
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Dear Xinlei,
I have attached a link that is helpful when citing quotations. It shows multiple ways depending on what style you're using, this is in MLA.
https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/research_and ... asics.html
I have attached a link that is helpful when citing quotations. It shows multiple ways depending on what style you're using, this is in MLA.
https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/research_and ... asics.html
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Dear Lauren,
I am so sorry that I can not log in that link because of the Intrenet limited, could you please stick some of them for me? Thank you a lot.
I am so sorry that I can not log in that link because of the Intrenet limited, could you please stick some of them for me? Thank you a lot.
-
Lauren S.
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Tue Apr 09, 2019 12:41 am
- Location: University Park, PA
- University: Penn State University
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
My apologies! Here is an example of MLA format.
MLA format follows the author-page method of in-text citation. This means that the author's last name and the page number(s) from which the quotation or paraphrase is taken must appear in the text, and a complete reference should appear on your Works Cited page. The author's name may appear either in the sentence itself or in parentheses following the quotation or paraphrase, but the page number(s) should always appear in the parentheses, not in the text of your sentence. For example:
Wordsworth stated that Romantic poetry was marked by a "spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings" (263).
Romantic poetry is characterized by the "spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings" (Wordsworth 263).
MLA format follows the author-page method of in-text citation. This means that the author's last name and the page number(s) from which the quotation or paraphrase is taken must appear in the text, and a complete reference should appear on your Works Cited page. The author's name may appear either in the sentence itself or in parentheses following the quotation or paraphrase, but the page number(s) should always appear in the parentheses, not in the text of your sentence. For example:
Wordsworth stated that Romantic poetry was marked by a "spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings" (263).
Romantic poetry is characterized by the "spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings" (Wordsworth 263).
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Thanks very much. I am going to learn more about that. 
Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Dear,
I had post my corrected essay again in the attachment. Thank you for comments very much.
In these-day exchange, I found something good as well as something poor in my review essay. After your advice, I think I have several points to improve.
Firstly, I should balance my opinions and the evidence in the films for them,not just say a impressional ideas without concise exlains. Secondly, it is a long way for me to promote my language, especially for some good and explicit expressions.
Last but not least, it is neccessary for me to make my stucture of the essay more complete and logical, avioding the main body is part from the original and ending part.
In addition, I am going to learn more out of couses.
It is my pleasure to read your essays, I am so sorry that I didn't give more pratical advice for you jobs. To be honest, I am very enjoyed rending and finding something different in our pionts for the two films and how to express our ideas well. Best wishes for your last essays, too.
Sorry for some delay on reply. Wish all of us have some good communication last two weeks. Hope we can have another chances to exchange on other topics. Thank you again. Best wishes.
Yours,
Xinlei.C
陈心蕊.
I had post my corrected essay again in the attachment. Thank you for comments very much.
In these-day exchange, I found something good as well as something poor in my review essay. After your advice, I think I have several points to improve.
Firstly, I should balance my opinions and the evidence in the films for them,not just say a impressional ideas without concise exlains. Secondly, it is a long way for me to promote my language, especially for some good and explicit expressions.
Last but not least, it is neccessary for me to make my stucture of the essay more complete and logical, avioding the main body is part from the original and ending part.
In addition, I am going to learn more out of couses.
It is my pleasure to read your essays, I am so sorry that I didn't give more pratical advice for you jobs. To be honest, I am very enjoyed rending and finding something different in our pionts for the two films and how to express our ideas well. Best wishes for your last essays, too.
Sorry for some delay on reply. Wish all of us have some good communication last two weeks. Hope we can have another chances to exchange on other topics. Thank you again. Best wishes.
Yours,
Xinlei.C
陈心蕊.
- Attachments
-
- After Exchange Xinlei. C A film review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa SmilesStandard？.docx
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Re: A film Review on And the Spring Comes and Mona Lisa Smiles
Xinlei.C,
It's okay if you do not feel like it is enough. I think it is great that you are able to at least identify the issues and work towards correcting them and developing your skills in English writing. I can only imagine how difficult it can be writing in a second language, and I truly admire your ability to do so. In your final draft, it looks like you have made significant developments in your writing, with some minor grammar errors. For example, a "dash dash" (--) is used for a dramatic pause in speech or to accent the part of the sentence coming after it. Moving forward as you develop your English writing, try to consciously keep yourself from summarizing and keep moving forward in your analysis. Always ask yourself, "What does this mean?". It's difficult to do, but you can always go back and find those areas where the writing needs more development. Keep it up, and remember, practice makes perfect! It was a pleasure.
Best,
Tierra
It's okay if you do not feel like it is enough. I think it is great that you are able to at least identify the issues and work towards correcting them and developing your skills in English writing. I can only imagine how difficult it can be writing in a second language, and I truly admire your ability to do so. In your final draft, it looks like you have made significant developments in your writing, with some minor grammar errors. For example, a "dash dash" (--) is used for a dramatic pause in speech or to accent the part of the sentence coming after it. Moving forward as you develop your English writing, try to consciously keep yourself from summarizing and keep moving forward in your analysis. Always ask yourself, "What does this mean?". It's difficult to do, but you can always go back and find those areas where the writing needs more development. Keep it up, and remember, practice makes perfect! It was a pleasure.
Best,
Tierra